Saturday, November 22, 2014

Weekend Writing Warriors entry #19


Another entry for Weekend Writing Warriors. WeWriWa is a blog site open to all authors/writers published or unpublished. Follow the simple instructions on their blog to sign up and then post a snippet of writing on your own blog to join in on the fun.


Continuing with an excerpt from my book Fiendish. The excerpt picks up in the middle of chapter 3 and I will continue til the end of the chapter. Last week Calida said her good nights and prepared to head into the house when Seth called her name to stop her. Will she get that kiss she wanted all night? Let's find out shall we...


If you are just joining me, click below to be taken to the beginning of this excerpt.

“Yes,” I answered, turning to face him.
Seth stood with a lopsided smile on his face, leaning lazily against his car, looking like the epitome of tall, dark, and sexy. 
“Are you going to give me your number, or am I supposed to just stake out your house so that I can see you again?”
It took all of the self-control I possessed to stop myself from squealing like a schoolgirl and jumping for joy. Still, I tried, but failed, to act cool about the fact he just asked for my number because I felt myself grinning like a Cheshire cat.
“I um, don’t have any paper,” I replied, patting myself down.
“That’s okay. Just give me your phone.”
I pulled it out of my pocket and quickly unlocked it before handing it to him.

Thanks for stopping by!



18 comments:

  1. Oh, beautiful! I find myself hoping it will work out for her.
    I've been that girl--but it was before cell phones. We'd have written the number on our hands!
    http://amodernvampire.blogspot.com/2014/11/weekend-writing-warrior-excerpt-1-pa.html

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    1. Aww...she's hoping it works out too. If she had a pen I'm sure she would have scribbled it on his hands but she travel's light and only had a wallet.

      thanks for stopping by

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  2. He's sooooo charming! And so creepy at the same time. I love the way you're building this tension. Is he a good guy, is he a bad guy? I'm just not sure!!! :-)

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    1. LOL...he is very charming :). Says all the right things and has a million dollar smile, the perfect catch. Right????

      thanks for stopping by

      Delete
  3. You tell a lot in 8. Good tension, good quick peeks into both characters. I like the idea of a dual 1st POV. Eager to read more.

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    1. Thanks. It certainly wasn't your 'typical' first date. I'm glad you enjoyed the 8 and the writing style.

      thanks for stopping by

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  4. Very natural both the situation and the characters although she's careless with the number. Take his number first, you ninny. Maybe danger afoot!

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    1. LOL...well he already knows where she lives so giving out her number isn't that big of a deal. :)

      Ninny....love that word.

      thanks for stopping by

      Delete
  5. Hmmm, I'm still getting that vibe of danger, especially with him wanting her phone - it seems innocent enough and yet....so, an excellent excerpt!

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    1. LOL danger? She's just trying to get her number the easiest way possible and it will work both ways. :)

      thanks for stopping by

      Delete
  6. I love how giddy she is. Most women can relate to this feeling. I remember the feeling well, it takes me back...

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    1. She is very excited. That excitement of a new possible relationship.

      thanks for stopping by

      Delete
  7. Unless he is using her phone to dial is and leave the number, I am sure he is inputting his own for her use. She seems totally under his spell, so to speak.Hope she uses some caution, I;m not sure if I trust him totally or not. Good 8.

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    1. You are very correct about what he is doing. :) She is quite taken with him right now. He's been a very good first date and she's not getting the creep vibe from him so that's always a good thing.

      Not trusting him totally is a good way to go.

      thanks for stopping by

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  8. I'm loving their conversation. You're good with showing body language, so readers get the full picture :)

    Keep smiling,
    Yawatta

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    1. I'm glad you are enjoying it, I tried to make it feel natural. Aww...thanks. Sometimes I think I'm crazy when I'm acting out certain things to figure out how to best describe them.

      thanks for stopping by.

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  9. Seth sounds like trouble to me. When I was younger, I too many times made the mistake of falling for that kind of trouble.
    Well written--I can really picture the characters!
    http://peppersfetch.blogspot.com/2014/11/weekend-writing-warriors-official.html

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    1. LOL, he might be a little bit of trouble. He's nice looking trouble though, so he has that going for him right? :)

      thanks for stopping by.

      Delete